With night fast approaching, Mel, Elaira, Councilman Urslingen, and his son began organizing the citizens of Kryptgarten. Lord Urslingen shoved spears, crossbows, and slings into the hands of those not previously trained and showed them the basics of which end to point at the enemy. Elaira pulled one of the pantheists aside and shoved the Staff of Kitsyrral, Necromancer’s Spine, and Amulet of Sokol into his hands, promoting him to “Field Cleric”.
Barricades were quickly erected in front of the secret entrance below, tar and oil-soaked straw were spread in the passageway, and Tamn and his two friends (sans many of the magic items) were posted in the crypt. The two main staircases up to the battlements were bricked off, replaced by four temporary wooden staircases which could be easily detached. Petroleum tar and oil-soaked straw were also spread over the courtyard, ready to be lit in case the keep was breached. The priests stood ready over the gatehouse with cauldrons of boiling honey.
Hearing the sound of creaking wheels and marching feet from outside, Mel ordered everyone up onto the walls. Looking out they saw a small army, of some three-hundred hobgoblins and kobolds, accompanied by a handful of orcs, lizardmen, and even a few humans. The kobolds and hobgoblins marched in well organized ranks, four lines with tower-shield bearing hobgoblins forming the outer rows. Behind them came four large wagons, two loaded with sufficient tents and provisions for a protracted siege, one piled high with bundled ammunition, and the last loaded with ladders, planks, tools, and other equipment for building siege engines, each pulled by a pair of giant boars. Flanking the wagons were twenty hobgoblin priestesses, each carrying the traditional paired hand-axes of her station. In the rear came a powerful-looking half-orc, dressed all in gray, riding a fulled armored warhorse, surrounded by a motley and disorganized band of other armed hominids.
The wagons stopped just out of bow range, while a contingent of hobgoblins and kobolds marched up to within spitting distance of the wall, forming up in ranks under the cover of a turtle-shell of tower shields and shouting their defiance.
Mel ordered the drawbridge lowered, hoping to lure the bulk of the enemy force into the courtyard to be burned alive. Then she, Elaira, and Ash left Urslingen and his son in charge of the walls and ran down to ‘intercept’ any enemies coming in the back door. They found all quiet below, but heard a sudden clap of thunder from above, followed by another and the sound of crumbling stone.
They rushed back topside just as another clap of thunder and flash of light announced a lightning bolt being fired at the battlements. They dodged crumbling stonework and made their way up to the top of the wall. From their, they saw that individual kobolds were poking their heads out of the hobgoblin shield wall just long enough to fire bolts of lightning from their hands at the keep’s defenders, then melting back behind the defensive formation. The kobolds and hobgoblins were well organized, keeping tight ranks, and showed no interest in taking the bait with the open gates.
The defenders on the wall took occasional potshots at the enemy, but Urslingen, realizing the uselessness of slings against the metal hobgoblin shields, kept most of them in check, ordering them to keep their heads down and not give the enemy casters a clear target. Mel and Elaira stuck up their heads, only to narrowly avoid taking a lightning bolt to the face, earning some scorch marks for themselves and three dead settlers.
Determined to break up the formation, Ash cast a sleep spell at the front of the hobgoblin lines, dropping a pair of shield-bearers, as well as a half-dozen of the kobolds lined up to be next to fire. Elaira threw a grease spell into the middle of the formation, sending three shield bearers toppling onto their asses. Then followed up with a witch bolt, electrocuting a few of the hobgoblins through their heavy metal shields. Mel shouted the command to fire, and everyone on the walls pelted the suddenly exposed kobolds, forcing the formation to break and withdraw.
Ash stepped out in front of the gates, presenting an easy ground-level target to the attacking force. At this enticement, the angered kobolds did launch a ground assault, untethering the giant boars from the wagons and driving the creatures charging towards the draw-bridge. Ash unleashed a lightning bolt of his own using a wand, severely injuring the ten huge beasts, then dove out of the way, scrambling up the steps to the wall as fast as he could. As the boars poured through the gates, the acolytes on the walls sent a rain of boiling honey down onto them, cooking them alive—yielding some five tons of honey-glazed, roast pork…
As the watchers on the walls drooled over the smell of honey-baked ham, the hobgoblins and kobolds reformed their ranks and formations and began advancing towards the still-open gates.
At which point…two more food-laden wagons with another motley group of ruffians rolled up behind Noriss the Gray’s army. Of course, when the barrage of spells and arrows from said ruffians struck the bandit army in the back, followed by the charge of some very angry oxen into the ranks, it became very clear that they were reinforcements of a different kind.
Noriss’s army was thrown into momentary chaos. Elaira ordered the troops on the walls to fire at will, as Mel, the newly promoted cleric, the Urslingen’s, and the twenty soldiers that Werner had been training charged out of the gates. Francis Urslingen cast strength of one on the group, sharing his father’s considerable strength with everyone.
The small force crashed into the hobgoblin lines. A handful of soldiers were lost in the first exchange. Mel and Lord Urslingen killed many by themselves. The cleric with them stabbed a dying hobgoblin with the necromancer’s spine causing the now deceased hobo to rise, quite terrifying its compatriots. Then the call went up from the back of the fray, Noriss the Gray had been dragged from his horse and killed.
In the rising chaos of this sudden vacuum of leadership, Squire Grimnir appeared above on the battlements, the full fury of hell shining in his eyes and echoing in his voice as he proclaimed that “Now was the time for the hobgoblins to rise” (or some other such bullshit). Sure enough, a second full contingent of fifty hobgoblins came out of the woods to reinforce the struggling army, led by Grishnak, their high-priestess. As if on queue, the hobgoblins rallied and turned, not on the Kryptgartians, but on the kobolds, slaughtering them utterly, before turning back to the keep.
Sometime, roughly, during this stage of the battle, Elaira organized some of the settlers to haul the ten honey-glazed and mostly-cooked giant boars up onto the battlements where the priests went to work spitting them and setting them over the fires which had been used to boil the honey. Because, you know, pork is delicious…no sense wasting it.
Mel called a general retreat of the small force which sallied forth, which turned into a route as the soldiers saw the reinforced and blood-crazed hobgoblins forming up behind them and giving chase. Less than half of the soldiers made it back inside the keep and took to the walls as quickly as possible. Grishnak laid a spell of mass energy protection over the hobgoblin force, changing it to protection against force at the last minute in response to a volley of magic missiles from Ash and Elaira.
The full might of the hobgoblin army, more than a hundred of the creatures, along with fifteen remaining priestesses charged into the open keep right on the heels of Mel’s squadron, only to have the stairs to the walls collapsed from above, the portcullis shut behind them, and a hundred lit torches and fire-pots thrown down into the tarred, strawed, and oil-soaked courtyard. The first huge flash1 as the coartyard went up was sufficient to kill or critically injure all of the hobgoblins save Grishnak herself.
The hobgoblin priestess began chanting another spell, despite the flames roaring around her…until, that is, Lord Urslingen grabbed a spear from a nearby peasant on the wall and hurled it down, impaling her through the gut. The fire did the rest. Off to one side Grinkle could be heard whispering “We respectfully dedicate this battle to…”
Once it was clear that the hobgoblins were no more. Mel ordered sand to be tossed onto the conflagration, and the portcullis raised. When the fires died, everyone was set to work looting the fallen, as Mel, Elaira, and Ash went out to inspect the battlefield.
Not a single humanoid was left standing.
Out of the woods, near the mausoleum, came the Eidolon, crawling along on its six legs and casually chewing on one of the carnivorous gorillas that the hobgoblins so often employed. It paused, looked at Melastasya, then froze. Its body solidified, turning into a statue of solid marble. Mel hang her head at the loss of the creature and went back to picking through the remnants left by Lord Noriss’s army. Some minutes later, the beast began to move again, somehow without losing the stony gray-white marble countenance. It grew as it moved, increasing in bulk. Its tail elongated and sprouted a wicked looking barbed stinger. It crawled to the center of the battlefield and began casually snacking on the remains of the kobolds.
They returned from the field and declared a total victory. Instruments were sent for. The acolytes set the bells tolling. Roast pork was served to all. It was delicious.
And there was much rejoicing.
Friday, November 7, 2014
Justification for Your Paranoia
So, about a week ago my company got hacked by Russians. No evidence of them doing anything (like the Chinese, I doubt it took them long to realize that there was nothing of real value on our networks), but they did get in by forging a contractor's VPN credentials, which makes my job a pain.
Let's start this week's issue with an amusing Apple-bashing photograph...because that always makes me feel better (the use of this metaphor should in no way be construed as endorsement of the Latin apple=evil malapropism, even though Apple® is definitely evil).
1) I previously mentioned that the newest Android release would support encryption by default...
1) I previously mentioned that the newest Android release would support encryption by default...
Android 5 "Lollipop" is now out and available (for certain devices). If you want to upgrade, here is a handy list of which Android devices say they are getting Lollipop and when.
New OS or not, remember that Android already supports encryption, just make sure you turn it on.2) There an odd myth of infallibility/virus-immunity among Apple-lovers...
If recent leaks from iCloud, backdoors on the iPhone, botnet worms on OS X, and other breaches are not sufficient to convince you that you are delusional, maybe this week's news will.
First, there is "Wirelurker" a malware targeting both OS-X and iOS devices spread by "trojanizing" every app uploaded to a popular Chinese app-store between April and June (as of Oct 16, researchers had found more then 467 infected apps including popular titles like "Sims 3" and "Angry Birds"). Once it finds itself on a computer, WireLurker drops malicious executables, dynamic libraries and configuration files. The downloaded apps work normally to avoid raising any suspicion. It can spread itself via USB connections to any other Apple device by exploiting iTunes protocols, affecting both jailbroken and non-jailbroken devices. In short--it's just as effective and malicious as any virus ever put out for PCs. Given the price of Apple devices and the general profile of Apple customers (let's just say they are compelling targets), you can bet you will see more like this in the future.
Secondly, there is "rootpipe", a privilege escalation vulnerability in OS X. Basically if an attacker can execute code on a Mac using an administrator account, they can give themselves "root" access--letting them access everything and do pretty much anything they want. Of course, it would probably need to be combined with some other method of getting access to the machine (for which a virus like the one above might be perfect).3) Google is taking 2-step identification to the next logical step.
I've mentioned before that the kind of two-factor authentication that involves a code sent to your phone can be spoofed by intercepting the SMS message used in the verification. Many enterprise 2FA gets around this potential problem by using a "hard key" (a separate physical device that stores the RSA keys for the authentication). Google has decided to make this approach available to consumers using Chrome logins in the form of their new Security Key.
The Security Key, which only works with Google Chrome for now, plugs into a USB port. It will first verify that the site you’re trying to access is actually a Google site, not some third-party spoof. Then you simply type in your Google account password, tap the small button on the Security Key when prompted and — assuming you do have the proper account credentials entered — you’re into your Google account.
Of course, steps like this just mean that you need to keep even better track of your keys (the physical kind that you might occasionally leave sitting on a table). If you're not the kind who regularly loses small objects like this, you can read more about using Security Key here and can find FIDO U2F compatible keys on Amazon (or other retailers).4) The FBI rigs the game again...
When traffic-cameras became a thing, my father-in-law referred to it as the police "not playing fair" or "cheating". While my wife is annoyed the idea that he considers breaking the law a "game", he does make a good point: We expect our law-enforcement agents to behave in a certain way, give citizens the benefit of the doubt, and be open to reasonable negotiation when no one has been hurt. Obviously cops these days have ceased being reasonable and traffic cameras are only the tip of this iceberg.
Recent reports have brought to light numerous practices by the Federal Bureau of Investigations that even people like my wife would consider unreasonable. First, in investigating potential illegal gambling activities in Las Vegas, they cut a hotel's internet and posed as repairmen to enter a "home" and video-taped the inhabitants without a search warrant.
In the second, the FBI created a fake Seattle Times web page and news story, and used that site to plant spyware on the computer of a suspect. Needless to say, the newspapers involved as pissed.
If that doesn't qualify as "cheating", I don't know what does.
Thursday, November 6, 2014
The Amazons: Session 1 (GM's notes)
Being the first adventure of an all-female party of heroes based on this post from Rejected Princesses. In which the party from my Saturday G+ game come to the rescue of Wednesday's face-to-face party with the GM stuck in the middle as a proxy...
______________________________________________________________
The six ladies sat at a small table in the Laughing Goblin, the cheapest and rowdiest of the three inns in 'Civilized' Phlan. One was rich, local, and young. The other five were southern, slightly-less-young, well armed, and had been rich and lost it many times over. Which is to say, five were adventurers, and the sixth was the young noblewoman hiring them. The five called themselves the "Amazons" and had been operating in Phlan for some time, generally avoid council-jobs out of some strange dislike of taking jobs from men, but had a good reputation for success in their missions.
"Elissa, are you sure they will be gone?", Princess asked, addressing the sixth. The Amazons all had names like that--Princess, Hot Flanks, Battle Cry, Don't Fail, and Worthy of Armor--and never went by their actual names in public. A sensible option, given the number of mages, necromancers, and other spell-slingers in the town who might use one's true name to nefarious purposes.
"Councilwoman Bivant," Don't Fail corrected.
"Please, I am still just Elissa," the young noblewoman said. "I guarantee they will be out at the the indicated time. While I cannot speak for the kobolds or hobgoblins, the Council's spies inform me that the Bandit has accepted command of the attack and is sure to commit the majority of his men to the task."
"And we get to keep anything we find beneath the Well?" Princess asked again.
"No, not everything." Elissa Bivant shook her head. "Noriss the Grey has been stealing from the people of New Phlan for over a year. The Council has known for a long time that he has had a hideout beneath Kuto's Well, but have not posted any official warrant for his disposal. We can at least take back what has been stolen. Hopefully the bandit will be killed in his attempt on the keep...the Squire is most capable. If he should escape that encounter, I offer you an additional five thousand in gems for his, well-preserved and recognizable, head. As for the loot in his hideout, here are the terms. You may keep twenty per-cent of all coins and gems, the rest shall be returned to the city coffers and put in a fund to cover reparations to any surviving victims of the Bandit's attacks. Any trade goods, jewelry, and objects d'art shall be handed over to the city for possible return to their proper owners. Any weapons, arms, or items of a magical nature that you recover are yours to keep."
"So, five thousand up front, plus a share of the loot, plus another five thousand if the big man shows up and we take his head?" Battle Cry smiled broadly and gave Princess an affectionate noogie. "And you said we weren't getting paid enough..."
"Your terms are accepted, Councilwoman Bivant." Don't Fail extended a hand to Elissa. "Tomorrow night we shall descend into Kuto's Well and recover what we may for the people of New Phlan."
"Thank you all." Elissa accepted each of their hands, passed a purse full of gems to Don't Fail, then rose to leave.
"Wait," Worthy of Armor interjected, "what about the people at Kryptgarten? If you know about this attack and their plans, shouldn't we be doing something to help those settlers before they have a metric-fuckton of kobolds and hobgoblins land on them?"
"The Council does not have sufficient troops or resources to commit to the defense of the keep. In fact, knowing what we do of the forces arrayed against New Phlan, I am sure they would be quite overjoyed if we were to send a portion of our defenders to the keep and thus leave the city open to some simultaneous attack." Elissa shook her head. "I believe the Squire of Kryptgarten is aware of the impending attack. I trust the strength and ingenuity of the Squire and his friends. Even should they fail to defend the keep, the city has much to gain by allowing the attack to proceed..."
"Gain? Like what?" Hot Flanks quipped.
"From what I gather, the people of Kryptgarten have been the victims of at least two major outbreaks of plague in the month since they arrived here. Our monstrous foes will not take the keep without significant losses, and it is not unlikely that any survivors of their battle would carry the remnants of those plagues back to their lairs with them. Such substantial weakening of the kobold and hobgoblin forces might be just the thing to allow the Council to reclaim several more blocks of the old city..."
"At the cost of how many lives?" Worthy almost yelled.
Elissa stepped up and gave the paladin a sisterly hug, "I know the situation is not the best, but, even operating independently of the Council, I cannot send troops to Kryptgarten and risk an attack on the city itself. The attack is not to happen until tomorrow night. If you believe you can help the people of Kryptgarten somehow, while still carrying out the task for which you've been paid, you have my sincerest
blessings."
Elissa bowed to the five ladies and turned, "I must return to my new husband before he wonders where I have been..."
"Pffffffff, husbands..." Hot Flanks scoffed. "Is a council seat really worth letting that boy own you?"
"It is a mutually agreeable arrangement."
"Ohhhhh." Hot Flanks smiled and made some lewd gestures. "Have fun then..."
----
Once Elissa left, Worthy of Armor addressed the others. "You know, if we make sure Noriss and his gang die at Kryptgarten, we could then loot the well at our leisure and without any interference."
Princess nodded, "We could set up near Kryptgarten and ambush Noriss on the way. Taking out the leader should help significantly in terms of breaking up the attack. And taking his head would double our reward."
"Ever the altruist..." Battle Cry said.
"Successfully ambushing a noted master of guerrilla tactics seems improbable." Don't Fail remarked. "Though, given that tendency of his gang, I doubt Noriss is the kind of lead an attack from the front. If we strike from behind once the battle has started, we may have a better chance of taking him by surprise, and sew much confusion in the ranks of the attackers."
"How many other adventurers do you think we can recruit for five thousand gold?" Battle Cry asked.
"Hey! A thousand of that is mine. I'm not giving up my share for some peasants!" Princess said.
"Okay...four thousand." Battle Cry twisted Princess into another headlock. "We'll get another five for Noriss's head, plus 20% of the loot from the well, which should be more than enough for most of us." The others nodded their assent.
"Okay, Let's head over to the Training Hall and see which of the available free-lances are willing to rush off and save Kryptgarten tomorrow," suggested Don't Fail.
"Alright..." pouted Princess. "But remember, we're not supposed to make it public that we know about the attack...and, especially, how we know about the attack. And definitely not that we're getting paid for Noriss's head or about the well job."
The five ladies walked towards the Public Training Hall. "We should be able to hire a ton of mercenaries for four G's." Hot Flanks remarked. "So what do we tell them they're being hired for?"
"Maybe the Kryptgarten hired us himself?" Princess suggested. "Something simple...like the Squire's outriders saw some kobolds on the march and he asked us to hire some additional security. We could even save a few coins and say that the Squire offered a bit up front, and payment for services rendered after. Kryptgarten would owe us that much right?"
"So we shell out standard guard rates per day, with the normal addendum for spellcasters and veterans, and let the Squire cover any hazard pay and additional payout from their inevitable participation in the battle?" Hot Flanks smiled. "I like that plan..." she looked meaningfully at Don't Fail and Worthy.
Worthy of Armor nodded, "As long as we can help those people, I can live with a bit of duplicity, but we pay triple caravan for those we hire, since we know that they will see action...against stiff odds."
"Triple caravan rate?!" Princesses eyes got wide. "Seriously?!"
"Yes. We do not know that this Squire has the funds to field an army, and I will not send men into significant and definite danger under false pretenses unless they are well compensated."
"Sold!" said Hot Flanks. Then, more quietly, to princess, "It's only for two days...and we'll still come out ahead over laying out the full four thousand."
"Can it, we're here." Chimed in Battle Cry,
----
It took several hours of the girls asking around as discreetly as possible, but they managed to round up twenty-three adventurers of varying levels of experience--including a few newly arrived on the last ship from Hillsfar who had not accepted the invitation to move to Kryptgarten--willing to join them as "supplemental guards" for Kyrptgarten Keep for *three times* the standard daily rate.
After a long day of recruiting every non-busy blade waver and spell slinger they could find at the Training Hall, the ladies retired to their lodgings, leaving orders with the recruits to assemble outside the Training Hall at noon the next day. Hot Flanks stayed behind to "get to know" a few of the recruits...
----
The ladies and their ragtag band of mercenaries assembled outside the Training Hall the next day, lining up just as they would for classes, then disbursing towards the Traitor's Gate. While certainly not inconspicuous, the group did not draw too-much unwanted attention--Battle Cry did shoot Elissa a sheepish grin and a shrug when the Councilwoman passed them with her husband on her arm on their way to the Council session.
Earlier that morning, Don't Fail had arranged for a pair of ox-pulled large wagons from Ernst's Livery, and arranged for a large load of foodstuffs to be collected at the Slums Market--giving the group the appearance of a well-guarded northbound trade caravan (rare, but not unheard of) to throw off any humanoid spies that might inform Noriss's gang of reinforcements arriving at Kryptgarten. The hired adventurers were told, semi-truthfully, that the goods were to resupply Kryptgarten in case of kobold attacks.
Worthy of Armor insisted on paying all the hirelings their first day's wages up-front, which they clearly appreciated. After everyone was assembled, paid, wagons appropriated, orders given, goods collected and loaded on the carts, and additional time intentionally wasted by Princess and Battle Cry, the large band of soldiers, thieves, and mages rolled out of town across the North-bridge about an hour before dusk.
As they left Phlan, Worthy of Armor argued quietly to her 'sisters' that they should be warning the gathered sellswords of the impending battle, rather than making a leisurely trek of the thing. The paladin was, of course, out-voted by the other members of the group, perhaps better for their plan and the interests of their client. The deliberate slowness of their preparations and journey served to put the hired help at ease and lead credence to the illusion of being hired as regular guards, despite the apparent agitation of some of the girls.
Once out of the city, they quickened their pace a bit, Don't Fail claiming that they'd like to reach the keep in time for a good night's rest. Along the way, they found more and more signs of a large force having marched in the same general direction as they were traveling. When a hired ranger pointed out what were unmistakably the tracks of a large number of kobolds heading towards the keep, the hirelings sped up on their own, everyone realistically worried that an attack might have come early.
When they rounded the edge of the forest, it became clear to the hirelings that not only was an attack in progress, but it was much larger than any of them expected--a full-on siege from a mixed army of kobolds, hobgoblins, and other things surrounding the keep. A single gray-clad rider was commanding the siege from the rear of the army, surrounded by an apparent honor-guard of orcs and lizardmen.
Just after they arrived, a band of kobolds rushed toward the gate, protected from arrow-fire from the walls by hobgoblins carrying tower shields, and breached the gate with a barrage of thunder and lightning.
One hired halfling turned and fled immediately. Don't Fail stood up on the front of the lead wagon and bellowed a command for the other "new recruits" to open fire. A barrage of spells, arrows, and crossbow bolts fell on the rear of the besieging army, announcing their presence. The next command to "CHARGE!" came from Worthy of Armor.
Don't Fail pulled the pin tying the yoke of oxen to the cart and stabbed one in the rump with her rapier, sending the beasts careening into the back of the army, followed by a score of sword, spear, axe, flail, and spell wielding maniacs.
The battle was bloody, fierce, and short. They could see something occurring at the front near the walls, but stopped caring once a force of fifty-odd orc, lizardman, kobold, and even human bandits were in their faces. The hired adventurers fought as adventurers, which is to say, they each fought individually with no real coordination or thought for the others, save for the occasional, typically unheeded, shouted suggestion or call for help.
Worthy of Armor led the charge for her sisters, dodging as many blows from allies as from their intended opponents, cleaving a path towards the bandit leader seated on his high horse, using her own horse, Mfara, as much as her blade to crush and beat aside assailants. Princess rode close on her heals on Kalýteri, unleashing a color spray to keep a pack of kobolds from encroaching on their left, as Battle Cry, seated behind her let loose with a cone of flame to their right.
By the time the two horses reached Noriss the Gray, half of their force of hired mercenaries lay dead, and the rest were routing against fierce opposition from the bandit forces. Hot Flanks cleared a path into the fray with a fireball from her enchanted club, as she, Don't Fail, and the last remaining mercenary, a girl name Elanna rushed to join the attack on Noriss.
The bandit leader, seeing the main force near the wall breaking, shouted a few more orders then turned to flee, only to find himself face to face with the six girls. Princess and Worthy traded a few sword blows with Noriss before Hot Flanks managed to hook and dismount the bandit with her polearm.
Noriss the Gray hit the ground, and quickly succumbed to a rain of blows from the girls.
Don't Fail pointed to the woods, where another large contingent of hobgoblin reinforcements were just arriving. "Grab him and let's get out of here..."
The other girls did not need any additional enticement. They threw the bandit leader's body over the back of Worthy of Armor's horse and high-tailed it back towards Phlan...
______________________________________________________________
The six ladies sat at a small table in the Laughing Goblin, the cheapest and rowdiest of the three inns in 'Civilized' Phlan. One was rich, local, and young. The other five were southern, slightly-less-young, well armed, and had been rich and lost it many times over. Which is to say, five were adventurers, and the sixth was the young noblewoman hiring them. The five called themselves the "Amazons" and had been operating in Phlan for some time, generally avoid council-jobs out of some strange dislike of taking jobs from men, but had a good reputation for success in their missions."Elissa, are you sure they will be gone?", Princess asked, addressing the sixth. The Amazons all had names like that--Princess, Hot Flanks, Battle Cry, Don't Fail, and Worthy of Armor--and never went by their actual names in public. A sensible option, given the number of mages, necromancers, and other spell-slingers in the town who might use one's true name to nefarious purposes.
"Councilwoman Bivant," Don't Fail corrected.
"Please, I am still just Elissa," the young noblewoman said. "I guarantee they will be out at the the indicated time. While I cannot speak for the kobolds or hobgoblins, the Council's spies inform me that the Bandit has accepted command of the attack and is sure to commit the majority of his men to the task."
"And we get to keep anything we find beneath the Well?" Princess asked again.
"No, not everything." Elissa Bivant shook her head. "Noriss the Grey has been stealing from the people of New Phlan for over a year. The Council has known for a long time that he has had a hideout beneath Kuto's Well, but have not posted any official warrant for his disposal. We can at least take back what has been stolen. Hopefully the bandit will be killed in his attempt on the keep...the Squire is most capable. If he should escape that encounter, I offer you an additional five thousand in gems for his, well-preserved and recognizable, head. As for the loot in his hideout, here are the terms. You may keep twenty per-cent of all coins and gems, the rest shall be returned to the city coffers and put in a fund to cover reparations to any surviving victims of the Bandit's attacks. Any trade goods, jewelry, and objects d'art shall be handed over to the city for possible return to their proper owners. Any weapons, arms, or items of a magical nature that you recover are yours to keep."
"So, five thousand up front, plus a share of the loot, plus another five thousand if the big man shows up and we take his head?" Battle Cry smiled broadly and gave Princess an affectionate noogie. "And you said we weren't getting paid enough..."
"Your terms are accepted, Councilwoman Bivant." Don't Fail extended a hand to Elissa. "Tomorrow night we shall descend into Kuto's Well and recover what we may for the people of New Phlan."
"Thank you all." Elissa accepted each of their hands, passed a purse full of gems to Don't Fail, then rose to leave.
"Wait," Worthy of Armor interjected, "what about the people at Kryptgarten? If you know about this attack and their plans, shouldn't we be doing something to help those settlers before they have a metric-fuckton of kobolds and hobgoblins land on them?"
"The Council does not have sufficient troops or resources to commit to the defense of the keep. In fact, knowing what we do of the forces arrayed against New Phlan, I am sure they would be quite overjoyed if we were to send a portion of our defenders to the keep and thus leave the city open to some simultaneous attack." Elissa shook her head. "I believe the Squire of Kryptgarten is aware of the impending attack. I trust the strength and ingenuity of the Squire and his friends. Even should they fail to defend the keep, the city has much to gain by allowing the attack to proceed..."
"Gain? Like what?" Hot Flanks quipped.
"From what I gather, the people of Kryptgarten have been the victims of at least two major outbreaks of plague in the month since they arrived here. Our monstrous foes will not take the keep without significant losses, and it is not unlikely that any survivors of their battle would carry the remnants of those plagues back to their lairs with them. Such substantial weakening of the kobold and hobgoblin forces might be just the thing to allow the Council to reclaim several more blocks of the old city..."
"At the cost of how many lives?" Worthy almost yelled.
Elissa stepped up and gave the paladin a sisterly hug, "I know the situation is not the best, but, even operating independently of the Council, I cannot send troops to Kryptgarten and risk an attack on the city itself. The attack is not to happen until tomorrow night. If you believe you can help the people of Kryptgarten somehow, while still carrying out the task for which you've been paid, you have my sincerest
blessings."
Elissa bowed to the five ladies and turned, "I must return to my new husband before he wonders where I have been..."
"Pffffffff, husbands..." Hot Flanks scoffed. "Is a council seat really worth letting that boy own you?"
"It is a mutually agreeable arrangement."
"Ohhhhh." Hot Flanks smiled and made some lewd gestures. "Have fun then..."
----
Once Elissa left, Worthy of Armor addressed the others. "You know, if we make sure Noriss and his gang die at Kryptgarten, we could then loot the well at our leisure and without any interference."
Princess nodded, "We could set up near Kryptgarten and ambush Noriss on the way. Taking out the leader should help significantly in terms of breaking up the attack. And taking his head would double our reward."
"Ever the altruist..." Battle Cry said.
"Successfully ambushing a noted master of guerrilla tactics seems improbable." Don't Fail remarked. "Though, given that tendency of his gang, I doubt Noriss is the kind of lead an attack from the front. If we strike from behind once the battle has started, we may have a better chance of taking him by surprise, and sew much confusion in the ranks of the attackers."
"How many other adventurers do you think we can recruit for five thousand gold?" Battle Cry asked.
"Hey! A thousand of that is mine. I'm not giving up my share for some peasants!" Princess said.
"Okay...four thousand." Battle Cry twisted Princess into another headlock. "We'll get another five for Noriss's head, plus 20% of the loot from the well, which should be more than enough for most of us." The others nodded their assent.
"Okay, Let's head over to the Training Hall and see which of the available free-lances are willing to rush off and save Kryptgarten tomorrow," suggested Don't Fail.
"Alright..." pouted Princess. "But remember, we're not supposed to make it public that we know about the attack...and, especially, how we know about the attack. And definitely not that we're getting paid for Noriss's head or about the well job."
The five ladies walked towards the Public Training Hall. "We should be able to hire a ton of mercenaries for four G's." Hot Flanks remarked. "So what do we tell them they're being hired for?"
"Maybe the Kryptgarten hired us himself?" Princess suggested. "Something simple...like the Squire's outriders saw some kobolds on the march and he asked us to hire some additional security. We could even save a few coins and say that the Squire offered a bit up front, and payment for services rendered after. Kryptgarten would owe us that much right?"
"So we shell out standard guard rates per day, with the normal addendum for spellcasters and veterans, and let the Squire cover any hazard pay and additional payout from their inevitable participation in the battle?" Hot Flanks smiled. "I like that plan..." she looked meaningfully at Don't Fail and Worthy.
Worthy of Armor nodded, "As long as we can help those people, I can live with a bit of duplicity, but we pay triple caravan for those we hire, since we know that they will see action...against stiff odds."
"Triple caravan rate?!" Princesses eyes got wide. "Seriously?!"
"Yes. We do not know that this Squire has the funds to field an army, and I will not send men into significant and definite danger under false pretenses unless they are well compensated."
"Sold!" said Hot Flanks. Then, more quietly, to princess, "It's only for two days...and we'll still come out ahead over laying out the full four thousand."
"Can it, we're here." Chimed in Battle Cry,
----
It took several hours of the girls asking around as discreetly as possible, but they managed to round up twenty-three adventurers of varying levels of experience--including a few newly arrived on the last ship from Hillsfar who had not accepted the invitation to move to Kryptgarten--willing to join them as "supplemental guards" for Kyrptgarten Keep for *three times* the standard daily rate.
At which point I was forced to call a 30-minute break to roll up 23 characters in a hurry...
After a long day of recruiting every non-busy blade waver and spell slinger they could find at the Training Hall, the ladies retired to their lodgings, leaving orders with the recruits to assemble outside the Training Hall at noon the next day. Hot Flanks stayed behind to "get to know" a few of the recruits...
----
The ladies and their ragtag band of mercenaries assembled outside the Training Hall the next day, lining up just as they would for classes, then disbursing towards the Traitor's Gate. While certainly not inconspicuous, the group did not draw too-much unwanted attention--Battle Cry did shoot Elissa a sheepish grin and a shrug when the Councilwoman passed them with her husband on her arm on their way to the Council session.
Earlier that morning, Don't Fail had arranged for a pair of ox-pulled large wagons from Ernst's Livery, and arranged for a large load of foodstuffs to be collected at the Slums Market--giving the group the appearance of a well-guarded northbound trade caravan (rare, but not unheard of) to throw off any humanoid spies that might inform Noriss's gang of reinforcements arriving at Kryptgarten. The hired adventurers were told, semi-truthfully, that the goods were to resupply Kryptgarten in case of kobold attacks.
Worthy of Armor insisted on paying all the hirelings their first day's wages up-front, which they clearly appreciated. After everyone was assembled, paid, wagons appropriated, orders given, goods collected and loaded on the carts, and additional time intentionally wasted by Princess and Battle Cry, the large band of soldiers, thieves, and mages rolled out of town across the North-bridge about an hour before dusk.
As they left Phlan, Worthy of Armor argued quietly to her 'sisters' that they should be warning the gathered sellswords of the impending battle, rather than making a leisurely trek of the thing. The paladin was, of course, out-voted by the other members of the group, perhaps better for their plan and the interests of their client. The deliberate slowness of their preparations and journey served to put the hired help at ease and lead credence to the illusion of being hired as regular guards, despite the apparent agitation of some of the girls.
Once out of the city, they quickened their pace a bit, Don't Fail claiming that they'd like to reach the keep in time for a good night's rest. Along the way, they found more and more signs of a large force having marched in the same general direction as they were traveling. When a hired ranger pointed out what were unmistakably the tracks of a large number of kobolds heading towards the keep, the hirelings sped up on their own, everyone realistically worried that an attack might have come early.
When they rounded the edge of the forest, it became clear to the hirelings that not only was an attack in progress, but it was much larger than any of them expected--a full-on siege from a mixed army of kobolds, hobgoblins, and other things surrounding the keep. A single gray-clad rider was commanding the siege from the rear of the army, surrounded by an apparent honor-guard of orcs and lizardmen.
Just after they arrived, a band of kobolds rushed toward the gate, protected from arrow-fire from the walls by hobgoblins carrying tower shields, and breached the gate with a barrage of thunder and lightning.
One hired halfling turned and fled immediately. Don't Fail stood up on the front of the lead wagon and bellowed a command for the other "new recruits" to open fire. A barrage of spells, arrows, and crossbow bolts fell on the rear of the besieging army, announcing their presence. The next command to "CHARGE!" came from Worthy of Armor.
Don't Fail pulled the pin tying the yoke of oxen to the cart and stabbed one in the rump with her rapier, sending the beasts careening into the back of the army, followed by a score of sword, spear, axe, flail, and spell wielding maniacs.
The battle was bloody, fierce, and short. They could see something occurring at the front near the walls, but stopped caring once a force of fifty-odd orc, lizardman, kobold, and even human bandits were in their faces. The hired adventurers fought as adventurers, which is to say, they each fought individually with no real coordination or thought for the others, save for the occasional, typically unheeded, shouted suggestion or call for help.
Worthy of Armor led the charge for her sisters, dodging as many blows from allies as from their intended opponents, cleaving a path towards the bandit leader seated on his high horse, using her own horse, Mfara, as much as her blade to crush and beat aside assailants. Princess rode close on her heals on Kalýteri, unleashing a color spray to keep a pack of kobolds from encroaching on their left, as Battle Cry, seated behind her let loose with a cone of flame to their right.
By the time the two horses reached Noriss the Gray, half of their force of hired mercenaries lay dead, and the rest were routing against fierce opposition from the bandit forces. Hot Flanks cleared a path into the fray with a fireball from her enchanted club, as she, Don't Fail, and the last remaining mercenary, a girl name Elanna rushed to join the attack on Noriss.
The bandit leader, seeing the main force near the wall breaking, shouted a few more orders then turned to flee, only to find himself face to face with the six girls. Princess and Worthy traded a few sword blows with Noriss before Hot Flanks managed to hook and dismount the bandit with her polearm.
Noriss the Gray hit the ground, and quickly succumbed to a rain of blows from the girls.
Don't Fail pointed to the woods, where another large contingent of hobgoblin reinforcements were just arriving. "Grab him and let's get out of here..."
The other girls did not need any additional enticement. They threw the bandit leader's body over the back of Worthy of Armor's horse and high-tailed it back towards Phlan...
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